Jester's Girl II
by Mikeala-and-Whitney
Summary: Jessie is still living with Wayne, going to school, going to her Arkham sessions but, the Joker's not letting her go that easily -2nd installement of my story "Jester's Girl"
1. Going to Arkham

**{A/N: Here's my 2nd installment of but of course "Jester's Girl" and I do hope you truly enjoy this installment just as you did the first :) reviews are gladly adored and welcomed :D Okey-dokey, here. we. go. *} **

**0000**

`I sat in the back seat inside Wayne's limo, Alfie was driving me to Arkham Asylum. Today was my first session with the hovering and smothering _Dr. Noelle Arkham_. You remember her, right? Yeah. Thought so. Apparently they thought I had some emotional internal trauma that I needed to work out at Arkham of all places. Gordon had disagreed with it of course but whatever. And okay, maybe I'm being a little mean to Noelle there but she was a little smothering, I mean I told you she was. And whatever reason would little ol' me have to lie to you lovely readers out there? Hmm? Okey-dokey then.

I looked out the side window, staring at the buildings that we passed, heading to bridge that took people to the Narrows. I sighed softly and sat back and turned away from the window, looking down at my fish-net fingerless gloved hands that were in my lap. The gloves were black and I liked them. Wayne had let me get them from Hot Topic after the whole GCPD incident. I'd rather not talk about that though at the moment. It made me sad for some reason. Maybe I'm depressed, that's what the other doctors at the hospital said. I didn't like them. At. All.

Alfie looked at me in the rear view mirror, even with my head turned down I could feel his eyes burning into my head but when I looked up he had his eyes back on the road again. We were about to go over the bridge as I could tell when I had leaned forward, looking out the windshield. My hair was longer now but I wanted it cut, it hung over my shoulders so it wouldn't' get caught by anything or tugged from behind. I was going to eventually ask Alfie to take me somewhere to get it cut, and maybe get some highlights or something like that. I bet Harley would like that.

My eyes trailed over to the other side window, at my right. I looked out and saw the Gotham river now, we were already on the bridge. _Great_.

"**Are you feeling alright, Ms. Jessica?" **Alfie asked me

"**Alfred." **I never called him Alfred unless I was serious or scared, and I wasn't really scared right now** "What did I tell you?"** I quirked an eyebrow at him as he looked at me in the rear view mirror

"**Sorry, Ms. Jess."** I giggled for once, I hadn't done that in almost like forever.

"**Thank you. And, yes. I'm A-okay." **I nodded then looked back out the side window, that's when we fully entered the Narrows. I felt queasy now but I didn't show it. I just coughed once, clearing my throat and seemed to lean back into the limos leather seats, hoping I'd be engulfed by it. I looked over then down at the seat instead, seeing my notebook. My lips twisted into a grin as I set the notebook on my lap, then flipped it open. On the front it had my top five goals for the month.

**Goal--One:** Visit Harley.

Actually, I was kinda doin' that right now if you wanted to get technical.

**Goal--Two: **Get hair cut.

As said I was eventually going to have that one accomplished.

**Goal--Three: **Get back at

Falcone and her wannabes.

Well, she _did_ point me out when the Joker was looking for me at school that one day. So, it's not really bad to get even with her.

**Goal--Four:** Go to

Arkham Sessions held by _Noelle_

Hey, I said I'd _try _it not completely go to_ every_ single one. But Alfie would probably just bring me anyway. Now, goal number five where are you.

**Goal—Five: **Be myself.

Be myself. Hmm. If only it was that easy.

I felt the limo jerk forward a little bit then I looked up from my notebook and out my side window, seeing that we were deeper into the Narrows now. We drove past a small sized sign that read '_Arkham, 1 mile_' and had a arrow pointing right, the same direction we were headed. Then my eyes flashed forward at the rear view mirror. We were approaching Arkham Asylum now, one mile just as the sign had said.

The iron gates on front were opening and a guard stood near by in a little box set-up thing. He stared at me as the limo drove on by, and I quirked an eyebrow on me. He quickly looked away as if frighten and I had to put a hand over my mouth not to smile but then I licked my lips as Alfie looked back at me.

"**Here we are, Miss."** He tried to smile but even he seemed not to like Arkham. Who did really?

"**Yeah." **I whispered, not really answering but I looked at Arkham as Alfie drove the limo over into a parking lot area, slowly driving past already filled spots, looking for an opened one. But my eyes stayed at my side window as I looked at Arkham.

It was big that was for sure. Big and old looking. It looked dangerous but a lot of things in Gotham did. Finally Alfred found a place and pulled in, then turned off the vehicle. The limo stopped moving then and was lifeless. I slowly closed my notebook, setting it to aside onto the seat at my right. I looked back at Alfie with a smile and he got out but I had already opened my side door, he stood there pulling it a little bit more open for me, smiling the best he could.

I stepped onto the parking lot gravel and was happy that I wore nice shoes today. It looked like if I had worn my sneakers or something that I'd have rocks stabbing into them and all that good stuff. Alfie nodded and guided me around the main parking lot to Arkham's main doors, we walked up the few dirty marble steps that made me cringe slightly but I ignored it then Alfie opened the right side door for me and I walked on into Arkham Asylum.

Alfie was right behind me but I felt like I was alone at the moment. I looked around and saw guards standing near by, all staring at me as I walked on by with Alfie up to the main information nurse's desk. At least that's what the sign overhead said with the nice little arrow pointing forward for our amusement.

"**I'll go check you in for your appointment today then I'll be right back in a jiffy." **Did Alfie honestly just say the word '_jiffy_'? It made me smile but I nodded anyway

"**May I go sit in the waiting room?" **I looked over at the sign that said the waiting room was only so far away and Alfie looked at me as I looked back at him, he nodded with a smile then walked over to the main desk, away from me. I grinned but then it faded as I turned on my heel and walked away into the waiting room, sighing as I looked around. There were empty seats. Apparently today just wasn't visiting day or something.

The sound of my footsteps seemed to echo against the dirty marble floor as I walked towards the farthest corner seat, plopping down with a sigh of relief. My eye lids drooped as I looked down at nothing really, folding my arms across my chest I leaned back in the seat but then repositioned myself quickly as I felt uncomfortable. Dang it. How was someone supposed to sit in these plastics little things? Oh well. I just propped my legs up so I could hug them tightly to my chest, and rest my chin on my knees. It was cold in here. Didn't they have a temperature device thingy or something? This is one of the many, many reasons people don't want to visit Arkham, aside from all it's inmates that house the place.

I shut my eye lids for a few moments, breathing regularly for once but then...

"**Coop!" **

_Oy vey_.

My eye lids flashed open and I tried to un-prop my legs but then I was tackled by no other Harley Quinn, my new mummy. She lifted me up and off the seat, my legs dangling in the air as she held me up like that in a tight hug. My ribs started to hurt after a while but then she finally put me back down on the ground and let me stand up straight. I looked at her with a slight twitch of the eye but still I forced a smile. My lips at first just twitched and tried to resist it but I smiled. I really did.

"**Hiya, Harley."** I groaned as she pulled me into another hug, her giggle was really high pitched and hurt my ears this time just like it had all those other times.

Secretly I wondered where the Joker was but I didn't have to wait long for an answer as Harley released me again, I backed up two steps and she looked at me with her head tilted to the side and her blond bangs shifted to the side again so it hid her left eye just like before but today her hair was also in pixie like pig-tails. Well, I had to admit, Harley Quinn did have good fashion sense at times.

"**Mr. J doesn't know I'm up here. He thinks I'm out gettin' some face paint for him from the nurse's station."** Face. Paint. But of course.

"**Really?"** I tried to act surprise and it worked as Harley nodded quickly but then looking around as if worried someone was watching before her eyes rested back onto me **"Harley, does anyone else...know you're in this...particular area?" **

Her happy joy-joy attitude quickly faded to a gloomy state then to a fake mask of confidence **"Of course they do."**

And _of course_ she was lying. She had to be really persuasive to have a guard let her up here of all places. The waiting room to be exact as said before. I quirked an eyebrow at her answer and stepped to the right side, slowly moving around her as if wanting to run off and Harley was watching me, so she reached over, pulling me to her side, wrapping her right arm around me and I could hardly breath with my face was pressed against her right cheek uncomfortably. The smell of sweet ginger created my sense and it made me smile for real this time, not a mask of something I wasn't. _Mask._

I would have shook my head in protest at my thought there if I hadn't been pressed against Harley here like that. Then the sound of guards shuffling over echoed and I felt a tugging, two arms wrapping around my waist and pulling me back, trying to pull me out of Harley's embrace. I could hear Harley's protesting as they finally got me out of her hold, pulling me far away from her but my eyes remained on lock.

Harley was clawing and biting at the guards that tried to pin her down to the ground, kicking and shoving to get away. To get to me.

But then one of them hit her with his plastic see-through cane that he carried obviously on his belt. That triggered my anger as I lashed forward and then the guard who held me hit me on the head and sadly for him, his left hand that he chose to hit me with had delayed pulling back and I snapped my teeth at it, biting down hard until I could taste the rusty moisture of blood touch my tongue and then I was hit by another guard and I pulled back, my lips stained blood. I snarled at him and felt my arms pinned together behind my back and I flipped my heart back.

Then I saw Alfie standing near by with a horror struck face but then he seemed to remember how to move and went directly at the guard who now held me and had a determine look on his face.

"**Let her go." **Alfie didn't have to ask twice as the guard who held me took one look at Alfie's face and let me go, stepping away and I could see in the corner of my eye, Harley being dragged away out of the room. Still conscious too which made me relieved to no end. I wiped my mouth with my sleeve then looked over at Alfie, he had a look of relief as well on his face then he beckoned me away, leading me out of the waiting room and away from the other remaining guards.

"**He hit me."** I looked up at Alfie as he guided me away, biting my lower lip that was still a little bit stained with blood as I could feel it. Alfie stopped and tried to smile as he took out a tissue from his pocket, dabbing it softly on my lips a few times before placing it back into his pocket then continued to guide me away like he had moments before.

"**I know." **He nodded in agreement** "I know." **

But he was just saying that. So I wouldn't make a scene, not that I planned to. I was just upset at the moment, ticked off at the guards and how they acted. People were rude here. No wonder if had such a bad reputation, other than the Doctors and inmates. I licked my lips once, then waited in another area with Alfie until a petite nurse called my name

"**Jessica Hilton?"** I cringed as she said my first name, nobody really called me '_Jessica _' anymore but I forced a smile and nodded as she looked over at me, getting up from seat and looked back at Alfie once then back at the Nurse, who guided me around the corner, out of Alfie's sight then down the hallway.

We passed a set of cells, see through plastic walls in the front of each cell, inmates in them, staring at me with greedy eyes. As if they wanted to get me alone in a room with no one around. I looked at one them and narrowed my eyebrows, their eyes widen and they quickly dashed back into one of the furthest corners away from the front of the cell, whimpering. I raised my eyebrows then at this, nearly in awe until I felt the Nurse tug at my arm. My gaze snapped back to the pretty little Nurse and then walked around the left corner with her but then she stopped. Her beeper was going off.

"**Um--"** She looked back up at me with a worried expression** "You think you can get to the room okay?"**

"**Oh, sure." **I nodded, mocking her a little bit but held back the urge to take it too far

"**Okey-dokey then." **She smiled then scurried back down the right side hallway and around the corner, out of my view. I snickered but then cleared my throat and looked back at the left, at all the doors that were lined up. Now just to find which one. _Gee, this would be fun_.

**0000**


	2. Turtles In the Hospital

**0000**

`Robbie laid in the hospital bed with his eye lids shut, he was starting to wake up due to his monitors that were attached to him through needles and plastic tubes were beeping a little to loudly. A breathing tube hooked up to help him breath. He had lost a lot of blood all thanks to the metal pole...thanks to the Joker. His eye lids fluttered at first then opened and the first thing he saw was a bright light, the flash light from a camera and the first thing he heard was my voice

"**Smile!" **Then I took another snap shot quickly before he started to shield his eyes with his left hand, raising it up in front of his face and I grinned, stepping back away from the bed a little, still holding my camera in my hands, my right hand pointer finger still hovering over the small silver button that made the flash go off to take a picture. I watched him as he squeezed his eye lids shut for a moment, then reopened them wide then they drooped as he moved his head to the left, to look at me.

"**You really should have smiled, Rob." **I told him, sighing and looking down at the camera in my hands for a moment before setting the camera down on the stand beside the hospital bed, gently and slowly then I looked back at Robbie, a smile still on my lips **"Don't worry. I'll get you copies of the pics." **

Robbie tried to laugh but then he noticed the breathing tube down his throat for the first time, he started to gag and my smile faded. I dashed over to him quickly in worry. Yes, I worried about Robbie. So what? It wasn't like I had a crush on him or anything, we were just friends.

"**Calm down. It's just to help you breathing, Robbie--" **But he didn't care what I had to say, he already ripped off the table holding it in place then started to pull the long tube out of his throat with both hands, gagging all the while. I watched in slight disgust before looking away for a moment then looked back at him, he coughed loudly and harshly as he finally got all the tube out then tossed the breathing tube aside onto a metal table near by.

"_**That**_**. **_**Was**_**..."** He shuddered, his voice very soft, in a whisper **"**_**Disgusting**_**."**

"**Thought so." **I nodded, then knelt down on both knees onto the marble ground, laying my arms on the mattress of the bed, propping my head up by placing my head down on top of my arms. I snapped my teeth together once then licked my lips and let my eye lids droop **"I missed you."** I admitted in a soft whisper then bit my lower lip, Robbie leaned his head back down slowly on his pillow, looking at me with a grin.

"**Of course you did."** He chuckled under his breath, then coughed harshly again in pain but still grinned. He then looked away from me, letting his eyes wander around the room. At the only batch of flowers I got him and the cute little stuffed animal turtle that was named '_Flash_'. Turtles were often seen as slow movers but they were better protected due to their hard shells from predators that want to eat them. Because Turtles are beastie like that.

"**A turtle?"** Ha ha. He noticed. Yay.

"**Flash likes you." **I whispered with a soft giggle. I think Harley's behavior was finally rubbing off on me now.

"**Flash?"** He looked back over at me, quirking an eyebrow

"**What?"** I asked, faking a hurt expression at him judging the name

"**No, no. I like the name." **He assumed that's why I was upset and I got that crooked grin on my lips once more.

"**That's what I thought you'd say." **I then got back up to my feet slowly, using the palms of my hands for support as I stretched and looked back at him again. Sometimes he was annoying but I enjoyed having him around, he was fun.

I heard the door creaking open and in popped another nurse **"Oh, is he awake?"** Then she noticed the ripped out tube laying on the metal tray **"Oh my."** She panicked and dashed on over, nearly shoving me away and I glared at her as I stepped on away.

Robbie watched me as she went on asking him if he was in pain, I made faces behind her, mocking and making fun of this little buzzard. When she noticed he was looking behind her she stopped and looked back, I stopped my faces immediately and looked away, acting as if I wasn't doing anything at all. The nurse narrowed her eyebrows in suspicion and I looked back at her with a confused face, faking it of course. She finally looked away and back at Robbie with a annoyed sigh **"You shouldn't have done that. I'll go get your doctor. Now don't do anything else until the Doctor gets here, okay?" **

Robbie nodded and gave a thumbs up, the Nurse rolled her eyes and quickly left the room. After she was gone, Robbie and I burst out laughing but Rob there started to cough again so I slowly stepped towards the hospital room doorway.

"**Where--" **He coughed again** "Where are you going?" **

I looked at him with a quirked eyebrow then tucked my blond hair behind my ears, clearing my throat slightly and he took that as a sign of thinking up a excuse because I saw his eyebrows narrow.

"**I have to go anyway but I'll be back."**

"**Where are you going?"** He asked again, getting annoyed quickly. Gee, he was too suspicious at times. As if I was cheating on our friendship by getting another friend on the side.

"**To go home so Wayne doesn't get paranoid?"**

He scoffed slightly then under his breath, easing up right away **"'Kay. But you're coming back later, right?"**

"**No, I thought I'd like go have Harley braid my hair then have the Riddler gives us puzzles to solve. Then come back to see you."**

"**Very funny." **

"**Oh, c'mon."** I grinned **"It was funny at the moment."**

"**See you later?"** He asked, looking down with drooped eye lids, almost worried that I'd say no for real this time

"**Of course." **I nodded and he looked back up at me, a smile on his lips. He was happy now. Satisfied. I giggled and then turned on my heel, walking completely out of the room and then down the right side hallway, my shoes squeaking softly against the already wet marble floor.

Well, it had been raining outside moments before I had gotten here. Maybe it'd rain some more. I liked the rain. It was nice and the fact was as well, no one could tell you were crying in the rain. I walked over into the waiting room and headed for the entrance/exit doors, opening the right side door and walked out, leaving all the buzzing and noise in the clinic behind me as I continued to walk out and stop as a long limo pulled up. Alfie was here. But then the side door opened up and I saw Wayne looking at me with a small smile.

"**Get in." **It wasn't really a request which made me annoyed but I got in anyway. Sitting down on the seat beside Wayne, I shut the door and then the limo started to move forward, driving away from the clinic. I then started buckling up and not even looking at Wayne at all. But I heard Wayne's sigh, this was a sign that he was about to talk. I learned that during the months I've been under his_ care_. Not that I saw much of him anyway.

"**How's um—" **He couldn't even remember my best friend's name but that's what I kind of expected really to be quite honest. And that just made me even more annoyed than it had before.

"**Robbie****." **I looked over at Wayne slowly, frowning now **"**_**His name**_**. **_**Is**_**. **_**Robbie**_**." **Then I looked away, out my side window, as I had hoped it started to sprinkle water onto the window and then it started to rain.

"**How is he though?"** Did he actually sound concern? I looked back, no longer frowning but kind of suspicious.

"**He'll be fine. Why do you care so much?"**

Wayne frowned but then looked at me with a emotionless expression **"I'm not as careless as you think I am."** Then he looked away out his side window, staring at the rain or maybe something I didn't see. I stared at him for a few moments before looking away and out my side window again, watching as the rain poured down and I couldn't see much as the window started to fog up but I kept staring, just waiting to get back home. Wayne probably had to go back to work with Mr. Fox, who I liked much better than Wayne at times. He was a intelligent guy and always gave me candy when I visited. So he was pretty awesome in my point of view. Oh well. At least I had Alfie to chat with when at home.

But sometimes...I didn't like being alone. I wanted to have other friends, not that I didn't care for Robbie, but yeah, sometimes I kinda wished to be like other girls. To have what they have. To live how they live. My life was okay, and I enjoyed it believe me I did...sometimes though, that's just not a enough and it gets lonely. That's why I worry about myself as well. I know who my parents are now and I wonder secretly to myself at times...asking myself...'_Will I end up like that? __And if I do...Will I ever be able to go back to who I was before? Better yet. Will I __want__ to go back to who I was before? _'. That's what I worried about, because I think it's coming true and it scares me. It scares me a lot. But still, I had Alfie. I had Gordon. I had Robbie. I kept telling myself though after asking those questions, that every thing's going to be okay...even when I know it won't be. That I have people who care for me and think about me a lot. Because I'm Jessie. I'm going to be just fine, even when I know I won't be.

**0000**


	3. Cutting The Locks

**{A/N: Chapter three, yay :) hope you enjoy*}**

**0000**

`It was cold in here. And it smelled like medicine which made me scowl in disgust. I hated medicine except for aspirin. Aspirin got rid of headaches for me. Anything else just made me want to throw up. I sat beside the window on my new bed, well it wasn't that new but I liked the covers and pillows I got. They were all the color purple. Four walls in here that formed my room, two of them painted white and the other two colored light violet.

I liked my new bedroom. It was nice. At least Wayne had good taste in some things. I had my window closed so the wind wouldn't breeze end. I'd get a cold if did and I didn't feel like being sick this week. That meant I wouldn't be able to see Robbie or visit Harley, not that Wayne let's me visit her at all really. I reached over grabbing one of my fluffy blankets that fell off the bed then sat back up straight, wrapping the blanket around me tightly and breathed in the scent of it. It smelled nice and new, fresh from the washer and dryer.

My lips were starting to get chapped so I licked them quickly like I usually did, leaning forward a little bit before leaning back up then to the side, so I could pressed the side of my face against the cold glass. It felt really nice against my skin. My eye lids slowly closed and I breathed in the air before holding my breath for a few moments. Listening to the silence and calmness that was rare at times here in the Penthouse. But then I heard a knocking at my bedroom door, my eye lids flashed opened and I began to start breathing again. My head turning so I could look at the door **"Who is it?" **I spoke tiredly but I was loud enough because I got a response

"**It's Alfred, Miss." **Alfie spoke kindly and very respectfully, a smile spread across my lips

"**Is Wayne back or something?"**

"**Not yet, Ms. Jess." **He sounded slightly worried but he cleared his throat once before speaking again **"I was wondering what you'd like to have for dinner tonight."**

"**I um--" **I coughed a couple times harshly before being able to finish my sentence

"**Are you sick?"** Alfie just got more worried then

"**No, I'm fine." **I spoke louder then **"I'm um—I'm just not that hungry tonight."**

"**It's bad for your health if you skip a meal, Ms. Jess. Are you sure you don't want anything? I could make you some tomato soup if you'd like."**

"**Sure."** I forced myself to agree so I wouldn't worry Alfie anymore **"Tomato soup sounds awesome. I'd love to have some."**

Alfie perked up right away, I could see him smiling even though the door was shut** "Alright. I'll get right to it then." **Then it was quiet for a moment and I could hear his footsteps of him walking away, they started to fade at first then they were completely gone.

I looked back out the window then with drooped eye lids, uninterested really in what I saw as I looked up at the sky. It was going to rain soon, probably a thunderstorm or something obviously. Then I looked out at the city I could see from here, all the tall buildings and street lights being turned on due to it becoming night time. All the people below on the ground, some in their cars others waiting for taxis or at outside chafes. Star-bucks and Book stores. All kinds of things.

Gotham City was quite fun to visit...at least at daytime it kinda was. But see, in Gotham it doesn't really matter if it's day or night. If something bad is going to happen, like the Joker or something. Then it's going to happen. That's just how it was in this city. That's how people lived. It wasn't right but the lurkers here just don't care at all that it's wrong really.

People like Mr. Garcia. He takes what he wants when he wants to. He doesn't care what your excuse is. If you work for him, and you're late. He doesn't want to hear why you were late. And plus, you don't call him. He'll call _you_. Garcia's been a dangerous man in Gotham every since Wayne was a kid. When Thomas and Martha Wayne were still alive and the original Gotham General Hospital was still standing and not rebuilt. Before Carmine Falcone busted into the city. And I believe Garcia is the man that Robbie has and is been working for. That's why I worry for Robbie. Garcia's a sadistic man at times...or at least that's what I've heard. What if Garcia decided one day that he didn't need Robbie anymore? What would happen to my friend?

I could feel the tears running down my cheeks and I began to wipe them away but they kept coming, my nose was getting stuffed up and I felt like I could breath. My chest was tightening up. Throwing the blanket that I had wrapped myself in aside, I got up off the bed and quickly walked over to my bathroom door. Wayne had it all fixed up about two weeks ago after the whole only really two bathrooms incident. I shut the door behind me and locked it, walking over to the sink then and twisting on the cold water knob. I let the cold water run over my hands and my eye lids drooped shut, a sigh escaped my lips. I felt really tired but I had a headache as well. I was getting upset and things didn't go well when I got upset.

My head snapped up and I looked at myself in the mirror there that hung on the wall above the marble sink, seeing my nearly blood shot eyes and the tears that stained my face. I scowled in disgust and annoyance. How could I let myself so easily get upset? It was stupid. All of it. My eyes wander over to the plastic case that laid on top of a shelf beside the sink. It held first aid supplies, such as silver scissors as well. Well...I did want a hair cut. No. No, I wasn't going to give myself a hair cut. I quickly looked back at myself in the mirror. My brown eyes were darkening and it scared me. And nothing usually scared me.

It hurt and the pain my chest wasn't leaving. I started to cough and I glared at myself in the mirror, my hands resting on the marble sink as I leaned back then forward, repeating this about four times before then reaching over towards the scissors that were in the carrier basket. I snatched them up and yanked them over. Holding them in my hands then, I leaned against the sink slightly, pressing my weight against it. My eyes flashed back up at the mirror. My face was emotionless, even as the tears still stained my face, it had made my make up run slightly down with it, mixing together. Then I looked at my blond hair that hung a little longer than it had previously at the GCPD, a couple months back.

That's when I grabbed a lock of my blond hair and took the scissors into my right hand, putting that strand of blond hair in between the open silver hands then...I cut that lock of hair, it fell then, slowly drifting downwards until it hit the tiled marble floor softly like a feather. I had already started, so why stop?

I grabbed another piece then another, cutting that hair then the other piece. I stopped as my hair stopped at my shoulders, it was cut and layered. I think I did a pretty good job considering I had never cut hair before and that it was on myself and not another person. I liked it. A lot. Maybe some highlights would go good with it. I licked my lips then set the scissors back into it's carrier case on the shelf beside the sink. Taking one final look at myself in the mirror, I reached down and picked up every limp lock of hair on the floor then threw it all into the trash can near by.

My footsteps seemed to echo as I walked to the bathroom door, opening it slowly so it creaked them stepped back into my bedroom, reaching back only to turn off the bathroom light then shut the door close behind me. I walked over to my bedroom door then, opening that door and walking out, down the hallway. As I entered the living room, I could hear Alfie in the kitchen, making my tomato soup of course. So with my lips in a straight line, I walked into the kitchen **"Hey, Alfie. I'm actually not feeling that up to tomato soup. Can I save it for later maybe?" **

Alfie looked up about to say something but then he noticed my hair and his face turned horror stricken for a few moments before he gulped softly, taking it all in then **"Ms. Jess, your--"**

"**What?"** I asked as if not already knowing

Alfie then looked down for a few seconds before looking back up, forcing a smile** "Nothing at all, Miss. Of course you can have it saved for later." **He then went back to silently stirring the tomato soup in the cooking bowl, the expression on his face seemed worried but he also looked as if he were fighting back some tears. As if he were sad at what I had done to my hair.

"**Cool."** I nodded, turning around and walking out of the kitchen. At least Alfie understood sometimes, didn't judge that much like Wayne did. I knew that Wayne would be on my case later because of this but I'd be able to handle it. Just like I was able to all the other times. A sigh of relief escaped my mouth and I ran my right hand through my new cut hair, having that crooked grin on my lips once again. I really was getting into this haircut.

I went into the living room, looking out at the city before walking back down the hallway towards my room. I never felt that comfortable in the living room but I could tolerate. This just wasn't one of those days of tolerance for me. I reopened my bedroom door and walked into the room, flicking off the light so it got darker than before and I closed the door behind me, locking it of course before going over to my bed with that tightening of my chest beginning again and my headache dulling but it still lingered. I was still upset. _How great_.

I wanted to open the window, to feel the breeze come in now, even though I might get colder or sick. It didn't matter to me right now, nothing really did. Not even the Joker. And he nearly took everything away from me and he was probably planning to do it again. No. He didn't plan things out, didn't think of what he'd do tomorrow or the day after that. He created himself each day, just how Jeremiah Arkham said, Noelle's husband. But with The Joker. Instead, unlike nearly everyone else--He just...did things, ignoring the consequences. He wasn't a schemer. He was showing the schemers how...pathetic they were. How they were being stupid in their efforts. Because, according to the Joker...the only sensible way to live in this world was without rules. Still applies too. At least I think it does, at least it does in Gotham City.

I licked my lips as I laid down slowly on my bed, recovering myself with my fluffy blanket, hoping maybe to get some rest. I was still really tired. My eye lids drooped shut once again and I took in a deep breath before holding it again, waiting for a few moments before breathing again, sighing with relief again. Maybe I'd finally be able to sleep and not be worried. Wouldn't that be great to do for once.

**0000**


	4. Panic

**0000**

`Sometimes we don't really pay attention to what we have until it's gone. Maybe I should be grateful that Wayne took me in, he is the Prince of Gotham and where I lived before wasn't that grand of a place, so this could possibly be a upgrade on the social ladder. But it doesn't feel any different. I still feel the same as I did when the Joker kidnapped me. Numb and tired. That's how I felt. I just want sleep, and I mean a peaceful, not-worried sleep. I have nightmares of Joker escaping from Arkham and coming to get me, taking anyone I care about out of the way as he gets to me. And in the end of the nightmare, it's always my fault. It's a disgusting feeling to have.

I noticed then that the clouds were slowly drifting up in the sky, past the invisible sun that I knew was somewhere there, the clouds looking as if they were following me, that was a nice feeling to have; and I knew the wind was blowing as I saw the birds fluttering their wings as they sat gracefully on the branches of the trees. They had it nice and easy. All they had to do was fly south for winter and eat food crumbs at the park. They just flew away as if it were nothing, easy and simple. Nice. I licked my lips, somehow feeling the soft breeze of the wind outside hitting my face. It was soothing to me, making my already head-ache seem like nothing at all. Again, that was just another nice feeling to have.

As I sat in the back of the limo alone as Alfie drove the vehicle down the road, we got to a red light then and stopped. I sighed and looked out my window, then reached into my pocket, taking out a cherry cough drop and unwrapping the cover then popping it into my mouth, smiling at the sweet taste, then looked back out the window. Wayne hadn't yelled at me when he saw my hair, he didn't say anything. He just...walked out of the room. He hasn't talked with me at all the past week. Was he upset with me? Probably.

It was actually pretty out today, the sun shining brightly in the sky and clouds floating about and people walking the streets calmly, not a lot of noise. A actual calm day in Gotham City...but something just had to ruin that all, sooner or later today something or someone would come in to bring a little chaos to this nice day. 'Cause, oh no, Gotham can't have a nice or calm day. I know that from great experience.

That's when I heard screams, people running down the street and I looked behind in the back window, seeing a eighteen wheeler coming full speed at the limo Alfie and I were in. My eyes widened then I dashed forward, banging on the window that separated me and Alfie.

"**Alfred!" **I could hear my own voice painfully screech in my ears as I screamed

The window came down quickly and he looked back at me then saw the eighteen wheeler behind us then looked away, that's when I fell forward, half way out the window there as Alfie stepped on the gas, forgetting about the speed limit and turned a corner. My head-ache was shooting uncomfortable vibes all over, making it hurt even more, almost unbearable but I ignored it, as I ignored the feeling of vile trying to come up, my stomach churning in disgust some more as well.

"**Alfie?" **I slithered all the way in and sat down in the passenger's seat, staring at him wide eyed

"**You do get your advantages when working as one of the Queen's men, Miss." **Alfie turned another corner, and I fell to the right, my head hitting the window and that's when I decided that I should probably buckle up. Sitting up straight, I leaned back in my chair, my right hand clenching on the side door handle. Thank goodness the door was locked. Wait...Alfie worked for what again? Oh well. He'd probably tell me later on today...if there is a later today.

I closed my eye lids as Alfie turned another corner then we came to a stop, and my passenger door opened and there was Alfie, with a hand extended

"**Come on now, Miss Jess. We've got to get you out of here."** I unbuckled quickly even with my own shaking hands, and jumped out of the limo and took Alfie's hand, he guided me quickly over to the subway area, we scurried down the stairs quickly. I only looked back once and didn't see the eighteen wheeler anymore, but it was probably near. As Alfie and I ran across the underground subway area, people staring at us in confusion. But then the screen tv up on a tiled marble floor had the news playing on it. I could feel my chest tightening up, my breathing becoming shallow but I tried my best to stay calm, it was needed.

"**Joker has escaped from Arkham Asylum. I repeat to you, Gotham City. The Joker has escaped from Arkham Asylum and is supposedly in route to downtown Gotham." **The news reporter himself looked worried, as if he were sweating. Were his hands shaking? Alfie shoved me forward, which I let slide for the mean time, then into the subway train. The two silver doors near us shut close and I could hear Alfie's sigh of relief, I looked up at him with a small smile then looked away, feeling his hand on my shoulder.

"**It'll be alright, Miss. It'll be alright. I promise." **He whispered, but from my perspective he didn't sound completely confident in his words. I hoped though that he was right. That it'd be okay. But it's not gonna be that way, it will never be that way...unless something changes. Unless I change. It...It'd be always the running and the fear, the looking behind my back all the time.

It was useless to fight it, right? No, I wouldn't do anything until I talked to Rob—He'd know what to do. He would understand, because he understood me when no one else did. I moved away from him, over to a what seemed to be rare empty row of orange plastic chairs, sitting down on the middle one and looked out the window at the blurred objects outside the train. My eye-lids drooped and I placed my arms up so I could rest my head on them, feeling tired once again. Alfie was watching me, I knew that already as I could feel his eyes on me but then he looked away as I looked over slightly, my eye-lids closed shut and I felt like I was drifting off but at the same time I was aware of my surroundings. It was calm somehow in the train, even with all the other people here talking and some listening to music, others remaining quiet for now.

It was odd for me, being this quiet and calm. I was use to action and being jumpy at every other noise I heard, but here I had no worries...at least for now I didn't. My hair was bothering me, even though it was short now, but I didn't pay attention to it. I was too tired and bored to care, just plain uninterested on moving it to the side. I wanted to find some lip-stick at the moment, or some type or make-up to put on...I didn't know why, but it just felt right at times.

Wayne wouldn't understand though, he'd be more worried on what happened to me when Alfie loyally reported the issue to him later on. It was getting slower it seemed, the train I mean. As if fading away as was me being awake, I slowly slid off into my own little dream world as I was now taking a cozy cat-nap in a sub-way train. I'm sure Alfie would wake me up when we got back into town, and would probably have already called Wayne already or something like that. Hmm. Alfie did leave that nice vehicle back there where anyone could take it and not come back, Wayne would probably miss the limo too. Which means I might get to be riding in the bently more often with Alfie. Awesomeness.

**0000**


	5. Raining Nights

--

`It was stupid. All of it. All the dangers. The anarchy and fear. This wasn't wanted. Perhaps Gotham asked for it silently, by the way they lived, acted. Maybe I asked for this to happen to me. I did things, said something—being born to people like Harley and the Joker. They say that madness isn't heredity. That it can't be passed down to the kids from their parents. Yet they ask for family history of illness, that maybe how your parents or family members were affected the way you grew up or how you would act when you were older. Maybe it's true, that if you're surrounded by madness, insanity, the seen and unseen—eventually you'll be the same too. So, the question that's been asked: Is it genetic? Let's hope now, shall we.

I sat on the couch as Wayne turned my head to the left gently, cupping my face with his right-hand. He was checking for bruises of course, and to make sure I was okay after earlier today's incident.

"**I don't see anything." **Wayne sounded annoyed but in a dull way **"Alfred, what happened?"**

"**I've already told you, Master Bruce."**

"**And I'm asking you again, Alfred."** He let go of my chin, leaning away from me to sit up straight, still looking at me for a few moments before looking back over at Alfred. I rolled my eyes, licking my lips as I let my eye-lids droop, looking to the right for a moment until I felt fingers on my jaw-line again, making me look away back to Wayne, whom was checking once again for bruises and he found one as I winced slightly as he touched the corner of my chin then the other side.

"**Nothin' bad happened." **I finally spoke up in a grumble of annoyance, drooping my eye-lids as I began my glare contest with Wayne, but then he looked away with a sigh, letting go and just to make sure I moved further down the couch, away from him and closer to Alfie. I stuck my tongue out at him with a look of being a smarty-pants, as I was once called, more like smart-alek but whatever. I mean, I wasn't harmed that bad 'cause when bad stuff happens to me, worse casualties usually happen, like take the whole me getting kidnapped by charmful loony-toons, no offense, not everyone is crazy in Arkham—Well, actually I could be wrong about that, I mean Marissa Garcia doesn't seem—Nah, maybe Alice Riddles? She seemed nice, talking about wonder-land and what not.

"**I'm hiring someone to watch you." **

I looked at him mouth agape, even Alfie had a look of shock or at least it looked like that **"But I have Alfie!" **I protested, narrowing my eyebrows in suspicion on who he had in mind to 'watch me'. How dare he think he can just order me around like that, he's not my boss. Maybe I was being a little immature and a brat but I had good reason to be...at least I thought I did.

"**Well clearly that's not enough anymore. Joker won't stop, Jessie. He'll come for you over and over, even with the Batman being around." **He looked as if he was disappointment in that fact, averting his eyes from meeting mine. This made me quirk an eye-brow at that, my lips parting slightly. What was Wayne hiding now? **"And Harley Quinn's no better." **He got up off his chair, walking over to one of the windows, looking back at me then.

"**What's wrong with Harley?" **I asked getting a little offensive, she wasn't _that _ bad.

"**Alfred." **Wayne looked over at Alfie, as if sending a unheard request to him. Alfie nodded then looked over at me, faking a smile as he helped me up from the couch, not that I needed help.

"**Right, let's get you something to eat, shall we, Ms. Jess?"** He chuckled a little bit as if to add humor to the already uncomfortable situation, leading me out of the room even as I tried to sneak a peak of Wayne behind Alfie's shoulder, before I turned the corner I saw Wayne looking back out the window and let out a heavy sigh, then I was pulled into the kitchen by good ol' Alfie.

It was about an hour or so that I was against my will shoved items of fruit and veggies to eat, but that pasta-chicken stuff Alfie made was absolutely delicious, and what goes better with pasta-chicken than some tasty-tasty sierra-mist. Now I sat on top of my bed, laying back as I let my head rest on my new fluffy pillow, a hand over my stomach as I felt an stomach-ache comin' on, either that or another head-ache. Luckily though, I guess Wayne had partially opened my window so it'd be cool in my room, the wind felt nice breezing in against my skin. I closed my eye-lids, taking a moment to rest, trying to take a nice nap.

I turned on my side, facing the window with a grumble of annoyance, my stomach just wasn't gonna leave me alone, was it? Nope. I licked my lips, reacing up under my chin to trace the scar that was still there, as said it wasn't _that _visible but it stung still when I pressed on it, slowly I pulled back my hand to rest on my hip. My gaze moved from to my hand resting on the window still to outside the window, seeing some snow mixed with apparently ice begin to fall gracefully towards the ground.

My window was starting to fog up, just a minute ago it had been only windy, well it was still windy but snowflakes were blowing into my room and onto my face. I would probably have a cold on top of my stomach-ache, my eye-lids drooped as I placed a hand up on the window, feeling the coldness of it but then there was a knock at my door. I glanced back over my shoulder then laid on my back again, my hands resting over my stomach as I looked over at my bed-room door. I noticed that my poster on there was starting to fall off, I'd have to re-pin it back up later, I noticed things like this in moments like these. Odd.

I cleared my throat **"Yes?" **I coughed slightly, swallowing only to feel my throat was dry

"**Jess?" **It was Wayne, oddily enough I actually feel calm with him there, well at least outside of my room

"**Yeah?" **I turned on my side again, facing away from the window now, tucking my hand underneath my fluffy pillow. I could hear Wayne sigh, as if trying to stall from saying something for a moment or two

"**Alfred will check up on you later on." **

"**Are you leaving?" **My voice was soft but I knew that he could hear me as he sighed again, what was he trying so hard not to say to me?

"**Just for a while but I'll be back."** Just like all the other times, Wayne? Yeah.

"**'Kay." **I told him, looking away from the door, almost sad that he was leaving, I mean he had been really nice to me ever since I got back from the whole limo incident thing. I kinda liked the worry and genrosity I was being shown, it was nice.

"**You alright?" **Was he honestly asking me if I was alright? I cleared my throat again but looked back up at the door

"**Yeah."** My voice cracked as I lied but I gave a small smile, even though my door was close

"**I have to go, I'll be back later."**

"**I know." **I licked my lips again, coughing softly **"Bye, Wayne."**

"**Good-night, Jess." **I could hear him walking away, his faint foot-steps fading away

"**Night." **I whispered even though I knew he couldn't hear me. Then I sat quickly up, looking back at my window and getting up on my knees as I shut the window close with a little more force than I needed then plopped back down to lay on my bed again, not even bothering with a blanket as I re-tucked my left hand underneath my fluffy pillow and laid on my side, closing my eye-lids as I tried to go back to taking a nice nap. I could still hear the wind blowing outside even with my window shut, it actually sounded nice.

--


	6. Glass dreams

**{A/N: The part in italics a memory just to let you know :D *}**

--

`Mirrors can show you many things, some-times things you never expected to see or didn't want to say. They break, reflect and make-up illusions. So, why have them around? To make our-selves feel better? Or to feel worse? That's what needs to be asked. Speaking of mirrors, I stood in front of one at the moment.

I traced the fading scar under my jaw-line. A faint curved-hook line. My finger-tips brushing down the line. The doctor, whatever his name was, said it would be gone in a matter of weeks. Hmm. A scar, visible and fading. All except for the invisible of scars that pressed on to be seen. I quickly yanked my fingers away from the scar. My eyes flashed down at the white marble sink, completely spotless.

Licking my lips once, I turn the sink-knob to get cold water, it sprayed down into the sink gracefully. Like a pretty water-fall. I let my hands go under the water; the coldness of it sensational. There was a noise then, a crashing sound. I turned the water off then, defiantly not looking back. Something was happening, it wasn't a good thing.

What if the Joker was here? I doubt that the Joker couldn't get up here, I mean unless Wayne had some secret, hidden video-cameras that I didn't know about, or like some high-tapped security. We were on the top floor, but I heard that the Joker had crashed Wayne's party before, so I think it would be pretty easy to get up here.

I looked back up at the mirror, breathing a little to heavy. My brown eyes dangerously dark, almost no longer brown. I reached forward, towards the mirror. My hands were shaking. I pulled back as I could hear the faint foot-steps, but they were there. Still I wouldn't look back; even when my mind was telling me to do so.

"**Alfie?" **I asked, my voice nearly cracking **"Alfie, is that you?"** I was getting nervous now, and I didn't get nervous—at least not usually.

"**Wayne?" **Maybe it was him--**"Bruce?"** Maybe it wasn't. I started to slowly turn around then, my short blond hair nearly hiding my left eye at the moment.

"**Sorry, Coop." **A high-pitched voice apologized affectionally, sounding in a sad tone but then a sharp pain zapped all around and I hit the floor, my head cracking against the marble floor, my vision was blurred then my eye-lids slowly closed and I was out like a light. Dreams have a way of showing up and mixing with night-mares, which could be diagnosed as a Neams if you wanted to combined but they can mix into something that is toxic, that can affect that natural state of a person, can make them nervous when awake, terrified to go back to sleep, worried they just might slip right back into that night-terror. Sometimes though people's reality is morphed and the outcome is very messy.

--

`_An twelve year old Jessie Hilton sat in her fourth-period's class-room, sitting in the far-back right-corner desk, beside the window, not really paying attention to what her babbling teacher was saying. This was social-studies and she didn't really feel like hearing more about whatever she was talking about, it had been goin' on all week, and luckily it was Friday. She had her hair pulled back into a nice, bouncy pony-tail, she had worn flip-flops today but she liked the touch of the cold, marble floor so she had them put aside beside her desk on the floor, right beside her light purple back-pack, that had a nice puffy little green ball thing on the zipper thingy. _

"_**And then across the—Jacoby Lee, pay attention, please." **_

"_**Actually, it's Jacoby Falcone-Lee." **Jacoby responded with a smart comment, a mischievous grin on his lips as he leaned back in his chair, for being also a twelve year old kid he was pretty smart at times, just look at his parents. But his sister, Cassidy Falcone-Lee just looked at him from behind like he was a complete idiot, then again she was his sister. It was a nice relationship. He tapped his fingers on the desk, his nails painted green and blue and his eye-brow quirked. _

"_**Mr. Lee, would you rather spend a day in detention tomorrow or be quiet so you don't disrupt your other class-mates learning." **Clearly that was a rhetorical question but Jacoby just had to answer_

"_**Do I get to have** **Ms. Batts as my detention holder?" **He leaned in then, no longer slumped back but forward, his hands folded together as he grinned wide. The teacher shook her head, dismissing his comments and just went back to her daily-lesson of the day. _

_Jessie rolled her eyes, looking back down at her open note-book, going back to doodling on one of the pages in it, drawing a little bunny then a mini-doodle of herself beside it, writing her name and the word 'Bunny' in bubble letters beside it, she was bored and this was what happened when she was bored or just didn't want to listen to hear teacher talk. _

"_**Ms. Hilton." **Jessie jumped slightly in her seat, looking up from her doodles and lookin' around only to see nearly everyone staring at her, except for Joan Garcia over there that was to busy flippin' through her new book from the library, was that book about—Phobias? She shook her head as if to get out of her faze, looking over at her teacher was quirking an eye-brow as if asking a question. Like—'Are you paying attention? Or Do I have to give you detention along side Jacoby Falcone-Lee, though she never remembers the Falcone part.' Hmm. _

"_**Yes, Ma'am?" **This was before Jessie just started to be smart as well, almost as worse as Jacoby but that was another story. It was difficult for some reason for her when she was pointed out from all the others, picked by the teacher to speak but Jessie hadn't even been paying attention so she didn't see why---Oh, maybe that was it. Not paying attention. _

"_**Can you tell us what I just said?" **Jessie opened her mouth but no words came out, she just made a smalls squeaking noise, looking over at Jacoby, who was grinning ear-to-ear now. She quickly looked away from him to her teacher again, her blond hair veiling half her face, she licked her lips once, breathing slowly now as Jessie nervously bit her lower lip. Jessie was a quiet person all the time, or nervous but just particular moments made her jittery, jumpy in a way but she could be eccentric at times, different but guess this just wasn't one of those times. _

"_**No." **Jessie looked down at her doodles again, already feeling the disappointed gaze her teacher was giving her but then she heard her go back to her lecture again, sighing under her breath Jessie went back to doodling, wiping at a stray tear on her face and licking her lips once again. _

_After-school, Jessie got on at the sub-way train, her back-pack hanging off one shoulder as she waited to get home, it took about twenty minutes but then she was at her building, walking up the steps and opening the door only to feel her arm be roughly grabbed and yanked in, hearing the slamming of the door behind her. She had to really try not to trip over her own feet as she was dragged down the hall-way by Mr. Hilton, it was starting to hurt how he held onto her like that, there'd defiantly be a bruise later. _

_He kicked the door open and the door seemed to shake as it hit the wall, he dragged her into the room, shoving her forward but kept a hold of her arms from behind **"What is that?" **He hissed in her ear, pointing to a drawing she had on one of her sketch note-books. It had a drawing of him, and a poem written in cursive beside it. _

_Apparently he didn't like being called a lunatic, but it was Jessie's poem so she didn't see why—He tightened his grip on her arms then and she started to struggle, trying to get away, shoving him and actually twisted around far enough to see his emotionless expression, then his eye-brows narrowed in suspicion. _

"_**Let go!"** She screamed, but he threw her aside, Jessie hit the wall, her head bouncing off of it as she slid down, laying on the floor and started to sit up but then he stepped on her long hair as he left the room, tugging it as she tried to move she whimpered then he was gone, down the hall-way and around the corner. Jessie turned on her side, looking down the hall-way, already feeling her face becoming warm and the tears that so desperately wanted to fall she cringed, her expression one of pain as she tried to remain calm, biting her lip as her hands formed into fists, her thumb nail stabbing into her palm harshly. _

_She then made the expression of pure hate, anger and rage but then she slowly sat up, hugging her knees and started to sob. No one would understand, and she wasn't about to tell her guidance-consular at school, she wouldn't tell anyone about this. Memories have a way of entering dreams, to morph into a night-terror, which can also mix into the group and morph not only the dream but reality as well. _

_--_


	7. It was cold

**0000**

`It was cold, and windy. I knew that from the feeling of wind breezing against my skin, against my face and arms, it felt nice. I could also faintly hear something fluttering, or was it something clashing together, I couldn't tell. I felt something then…a sticky, wet 'something' was on my left arm and hand. It made me cringe but I didn't open my eyes, worried about what I would see. My breathing was becoming shallow and slow, the loud pounding sound of my heart-beat filled my ears loudly then. That's when my eye-lids fluttered open, the bright light stung my eyes so I gasped first then groaned in agitation, slowly turning on my side, my eyelids feeling heavy now but I kept them open and slowly looked down as I felt my hand touch the same sticky, wet stuff from moments before.

My throat became dry, but my eyes were starting to water, this happening every time I blinked. The sticky, wet stuff that nauseated me...it was blood. Small gasps escaped my mouth in stutters as I shivered, and the sound of my heart-beat no longer filled my ears but instead that creepy, carnival music from before came about. My hair--it had been tied back, into two small pixie like pig-tails some-how. I yanked my now cold and wet hand away from the floor and attempted to sit up, but soon felt dizzy. The room tilted a little then seemed to jerk side-to-side as I tried to sit up again, it lasted a few moments until it then became steady. I tried to find something to wipe my hands with, to get the smell to go away somehow as I still sat on the cold floor. I didn't know if it was my blood or not, but I really didn't want to know.

**"Hush now, Coop. It's o--okay." **Harley...I heard her but couldn't see her.

**"Shut up, Harl."** That was--Joker. No. He was--He was in Arkham. He had to be--No.

**"Sorry, Mr. J."** Harley murmured softly, but her voice seemed to echo. I tried to stand up but just fell back down, my hands hit the ground as I landed, pain arrived in my legs but I looked back up then around, it was dark in this place. And the music was still playing, as if repeating itself...like a scratched record. I made a small noise then as I twisted to sit up, it echoed as well. I started to hiccup then, shivering as I felt wind breeze through again. It was suddenly very cold in the room as I sat up; looking around then flashing lights appeared, saying things like laugh and smile, a jester like figure blinking just as brightly as the rest.

For once, I just wanted to be back at Wayne's, to be in my new bed and pull the covers over me and feel the warmth, the pleasure of it, hear Alfie's lectures and comforting words. I was not going to cry though, but that was a lie and I knew it, as tears were already swelling up in my eyes, begging to drop as I continued to hiccup softly. My gaze fluttered about, flashing over to each light that shined everywhere as I could hear a laughter erupt out of no where really, mocking my fear, my tears that were now dripping quickly down my cheeks, onto my shirt, staining.

"**I've been ****redecoratin'."** He chuckled as if making a witty joke, then cleared his throat a bit **"Thought you'd like it, make you smile a bit more." **I looked up where I thought he was probably at, squinting to look as the lights continued to flicker about brightly, making the tears drip down even faster it seemed.

I started to move away then, over to the far-left, almost slipping again but still staying up slightly, trying to get away from the lights and laughter, trying to find a corner somewhere in this place, the music stopped then, and it seemed very quiet as well, except for the breeze that continued to come through gently. It was very cold, and I could feel the hair on my arms starting to stand up. I wiped my face with my right hand, jumping slightly as I bumped into the wall, my back to it and then there was a sharp screeching noise, like someone running their nails across a chalk-board. Then it stopped with a sound of something like a mike being tapped softly, then a soft whimper that echoed all around. The lights stopped flickering then, shutting off completely until the same merry-go-round lights, from before, popped on and I could see the ride, twirling around in a circle again and again, but this time there wasn't any music to it.

"**But, Mr. J…" **I could hear Harley's fear but then there was a loud popping noise, then silence as I let my gaze roam back up to where I had thought the two were before. No one said anything for a few moments, as I slowly stopped hiccupping, shivering once. If I listened closely though, I could hear the sound of something…it sounded like vehicles driving by the building, and then some dogs barking, after that it got quiet again. There was a loud crashing noise and I jumped, covering my face with my right hand as my other hand still felt sticky which made me scowl again as I slowly pulled my hand back from my face, hearing small noises of what sounded like sparks then a screech, then nothing again.

"**You don't like the gift, do ya?"** Joker asked me then, sounding like a little kid who was just told he couldn't get ice-cream, he was mocking me. Then he made this sound that sounded like an almost scoff, then a huff of annoyance. I could practically hear him smack his lips together, it made cringe in disgust even though I knew I did that every once in a while…but that was beside the point.

I closed my eyes then, curling up a bit, hugging my knees, even though I found it disgusting myself that I was doing this, being a coward…I felt like I couldn't breath at the moment, I was getting another head-ache too. My stomach churned as I could hear another popping noise, then there was fumbling noises and I could hear breathing, someone was panting, and it wasn't Joker…Harley, it had to be her now, but I could also hear a squeaking like noise, something like metal clashing against metal, were their stairs somewhere in this place?

"**Coop, it's okay."** Harley told me in a gentle voice, giving a soft, nervous giggle **"Everything's gonna be a-okay really soon. I—I set up the merry-go-round again, do ya like it?" **I opened my eyes again, turning slightly to look around and I could see someone close to the merry-go-round, but they were still in the shadows, Harley wasn't saying anything now, but I could still hear her nervous breathing as I now presumed she was using a mike like the Joker had too when talking to me.

I let my eye-lids droop a bit but stared at the merry-go-round, well more like off to the side of it, still seeing the figure in the shadows every so often as the light shined there a bit. It was him…he tilted his head to the side; he looked as if he was grinning but I couldn't tell, it wasn't clear enough. Slowly, I moved to the side again, moving away, looking around then, wondering if there was a window or door near by so I could leave his place but wondering also if I could actually have the nerve to run, my legs felt like jelly to me right now as I gently moved to the side. When I looked back at the merry-go-round, I could see him nearing, he was closer now. I wiped my hands on my jeans then really quick then tried to hurry on over to a corner I could barely see, sitting up some-what now as I leaned against the wall.

The breeze picked up again, brushing through but it fluttered my hair up and made it go in front of my face, frantically I tucked it behind my ears, a few strands was now plastered against my face, my face was moist from the tears that now seemed to just lay still, ready to fall at anytime again. I clenched onto the hem of my shirt with my hands, twisting the fabric in between my fingers. I could still feel my stomach churning nervously, making me feel sick as I breathed deeply, and tried to remain calm. I closed my eyes for a moment then but when I reopened them I felt myself being yanked up on my feet, again my legs felt like jelly and the only thing keeping me up was, but of course, Joker at the moment.

I met his gaze slowly, and he grinned at me, pulling me over then to the merry-go-round, and somehow I managed to keep myself from going limp again, still breathing deeply as I went. I was then twisted so now I was in front of the Joker, he had his hands on my arms, and squeezing them a little too tightly but I didn't utter a word, not even a peep. I blinked quickly a few times before focusing up on a balcony, seeing Harley there now and then an uncomfortable breathing at my right ear, it made me tilt my head away and I heard a chuckle.

"**What's your favorite color?" **He asked me out of the blue then, I could feel him let go of my right arm, then tug gently at my hair as apparently I didn't answer quickly enough. It made me narrow my eye-brows in confusion but I answered anyway

"**Green." **I coughed once, my voice sounded scratchy to me, like I had swallowed water too quickly or something. Then he tugged on my hair again but this time not as gently, as if calling me a liar **"And purple…" **I whispered at first but then raised my voice a bit **"Purple's nice too."** His hand then let go of my hair and moved to grab a hold of my chin, his fingers digging into my skin and then I couldn't help myself, I bit down on it and pulled myself away, landing not that far from the merry-go-round as the spinning object scratched a couple times at my back.

I looked back over at the Joker, he was laughing as he came near me **"**_**I knew you were a fighter;**__**let's see how tough you really are**_**." **He nodded then, slipping a hand into his jacket, reading in as if about to pull something out. I scurried onto my feet; nearly stumbling back onto the merry-go-round but then took a few quick steps away from it, moving backwards now as he neared me, tilting his head to the side as if asking an unheard question.

As the merry-go-round light seemed to grow dimmer, I then remembered how to run, and I ran into the shadows, stumbling once as I touched a wall and went through a door-way, I turned around and yanked the door shut, and backed away from it, looking around and noticed there was flickering lights and the walls looked cracked slightly with rips in the wall-paper. I wasn't breathing as deeply anymore but it was quicker now, as I continued to back away, turning around and running down to the end, but there was only a window there, and it was locked obviously as when I tried to yank it open it wouldn't budge.

It was cold again, just like back in that room. I licked my lips once again, continuing to yank at the window, pulling and tugging at the handle there but gave up after a moment when I heard a creaking noise. I turned slightly, looking over my shoulder at the door down the hall-way. Making my way back down the hall-way, I noticed there was a laundry vent conveniently there, but…what if...No. Quickly, I yanked it open, sliding in, which was a mistake, as I went zipping down the long metal vent and landed on what felt hard but soft at the same time. I looked around a moment, my eye lids still drooped. But of course I was in a laundrey basket, groaning and closed my eyes for a moment before opening them again, I knew I should move but actually liked the feeling of this, being able to feel relaxed for a moment.

There were more noises of dogs barking as I slid off the laundrey basket then, slowly moving over to a green door that had a rusted handle, I grabbed a hold of the handle, twisting it then pulled, and it opened. I moved to the right then, slipping through the door as it wouldn't open much further, moving out-side onto a small grey set of steps, walking down them and looked around. There were only brick walls, two green dumpsters near by and some cardboard beside the steps. I walked over to where a alley way seemed to be, looking down then back over my shoulder, walking down the alley and then ended up on a side-walk, I looked down both ways, seeing some dogs near by that were barking and that was about it.

This had just been a chance; that I had been able to get away again…if I had stayed, I don't know what would have happened but it wouldn't have been good obviously. I walked down the right sidewalk, hugging myself for warmth as it was not only cold inside that place it was cold outside too. I didn't smile; I didn't scowl, just stared at things confused then looked away quickly. Maybe I should go back home, but Wayne would just…I jumped in place as the dogs barked at me as I passed by them, I stopped and looked back at them, glaring at them and they just stared at me in confusion this time, but stop barking. It started to rain then and I shivered once but continued to walk away then, re-tucking my hair behind my ears the pulled my hands away, shoving them into my pockets.

I looked probably like I had just gotten out of bed or something but I didn't care. I was cold and felt sick, all l wanted now was to get into bed, and take a nap. Just to pretend like nothing had happened, that would be the best thing, right? Yeah. My stomach churned again, it made me uneasy. I shivered again, and glanced up as the rain dripped down onto my face then I looked away, wiping at my face once before continuing to walk on down the rest of the side-walk.

**0000**


	8. Comfortable memories

**{A/N: Sorry it's so short, will try to make the next chapter longer :D hope you enjoy~ reviews are welcomed :)*}**

**0000**

`Jessie tapped her fingers on the table, hearing the soft taps on the metal as she leaned in to watch what her doctor scribbled down on the paper. She quirked an eyebrow as, but of course she was placed with Noelle Arkham of all people, looked at her and Jessie leaned back in her seat then, an un-amused expression on her face, she looked as if she hadn't slept in days. Jessie let her eye-lids droop, sighing under her breath as she looked down, away from Noelle.

**"So, Jessie, I hear that some...disruption has happened in your life recently."** Noelle had that usaul sad expression that Jessie was not so fond of, but she looked up at her nonetheless

**"Really? How'd ya know?"** Jessie gave a slight smirk then a scoff as she looked away again, now at her nails, tilting her head to the side

**"Would you like to talk about it?" **

Jessie stopped moving for a moment or two, blinking a few times before finally looking back over at Noelle, she tilted her head to the side again, quirking an eyebrow but then leaned in a bit, which secretly made Noelle a bit uncomfortable but she wasn't about to say that out-loud

**"You wanna talk about it."** Jessie smirk faded then, and that un-amused expression came in its place **"Ever have a day that just made you feel so sick to your stomach, a day where there's nothing but crap happening in your life? Where sometimes you just wanna crawl back into bed, and pull the covers over your head, pretend like nothing has happened but you know when you wake up again you'll be just shoved back into that whirl-wind that you call life."**

She stared at Noelle then, making sure the woman wouldn't look away without feeling even more uneasy than she already was **"Day after day, you sit there; wondering if today will be the day that he comes back. That maybe Arkham's bars aren't holding him back anymore, well they say that this is a place to get help, to be what you call '**_**normal**_**', right?"**

The light in the room flickered once then went back to normal **"Why did you choose this job, Noelle? I mean if I was old enough I wouldn't, just look at the place--it can really warp your mind, can't it? I mean this is a run-down building that's over-due to being closed down. These people aren't getting better, Noelle...they're getting worse. Just look at half of the people here, the patients aren't the only crazy ones. Now, I know I'm young and probably still a little immature, but I know the difference between helping people and just coming to your job to get paid."**

Jessie shook her head once, leaning back in her chair **"So, no, I don't really feel like talking about, how you so delicatly put it, the disruptions that have happened recently." **She glanced back down then, letting her eye-lids droop as if bored, twiddling her thumbs a bit then, not really smiling but she wasn't scowling either. The small clicking noise came from the clock, as it was now around lunch-time and they only had about twenty more minutes in this particular session. Earlier, Noelle had taken the time to clean up her office, re-arrange some books on her shelves and dust off the table, to make sure Jessie was comfortable in the room. Noelle sighed softly under her breath then, giving a small smile as if to comfort Jessie, knowing that Jessie probably didn't feel comfortable anywhere in this building.

"**Jessie, I know you've been through a lot, and that sometimes it can seem quite exhausting to you. But I want to help, I really do…but to help you at all, you need to talk to me." **Noelle slid off her glasses, setting them down beside her clip-board then, smiling gently now. Jessie glanced up at her then, scoffing softly then licked her lips before reaching into her pant pocket and took out her lip-gloss, twisting off the lid and slowly put some on, then twisted on the lid again, sliding the lip-gloss back into her pocket. Her nose twitched a bit as if she smelled an odd odor in the room, but then she gave a small smile.

"**Of course."** Jessie sat up straight then, rather arrogantly in a way, smiling sweetly now **"What would you like to talk about?"** She was secretly having fun now, nearly mocking Noelle as she acted proper, just how that one Allina girl at school did. Noelle gave a small laugh, looking over at her clip-board once, still smiling though.

"**Why not talk about what happened earlier this week?" **

"**You mean how Wayne didn't want me to come here today?" **Jessie sighed and slumped down a bit in her chair, folding her arms across her chest and bit her lower lip, glancing over at the clock for a moment before looking back over then. She shook her head then, as if shoving the very thought of that away **"You know, I uh—I don't know why you're asking me these things. We discussed them already before, and it's not important…" **She glanced down then at the table then, taking her right hand and started to trace invisible circles into the table with her finger-tips.

"**It is important, Jessie." **Noelle reached forward, placing her hand over Jessie's then, which stopped to stare at the hand that stopped her from tracing then glanced up, looking tired again and annoyed. Noelle slowly pulled her hand back, placing it over her clip-board **"You can tell me if something is bother you at all; you do know that, don't you?**

"**Why would something bother me?" **Jessie tilted her head to the side, quirking an eye-brow but then leaned back in the seat, tilting back on it as she looked up at the ceiling then back at Noelle **"Do you have any skittles or something?"**

"**Jessica."**

Jessie made an almost cringe, and then tapping her fingers on the table then **"Fine." **She pulled her hand back, letting her fingers play with the hem of her shirt then **"Yeah, it happened again but it doesn't mean anything, it's happened before." **Noelle didn't say anything, she just let Jessie continue on, letting her talk.

"**Sometimes people sit around and think 'Why me?' and they wonder to themselves, they dwell. I don't like to dwell but I do it anyway even when I know better. It makes you remember certain things you'd rather not talk about nonetheless think about, and with the Joker being my dad, that's something…nobody can make that feeling of waking up and wondering if today will be scary, if it'll make me afraid of what will happen to people I care about, they can't make that feeling go away. I know a lot of people care about me, but I instead push them away slowly, I mean look what happened to one of my best friends. I mean, he tries to understand—he has his own problems, did you know that Dr. Crane is his dad?" **She quirked an eyebrow, actually smiling a bit as she gave a small scoff but then shrugged

"**Doesn't matter though, can't change the fact I'm the Joker's kid, right?" **Jessie scoffed again but then sniffled a bit, clearing her throat and looked down at her hands, still playing slightly with the hem of her shirt **"I didn't want this, but a lot of things have happened that I didn't want. I'm dwelling right now and I'm not even stopping myself." **She looked up then, wiping at a tear that dripped down her cheek **"Gosh, I must sound so annoying."**

Noelle shook her head **"No, you're not, Jessie. You're opening up to me and that's a good thing. You're a good person, a wonderful young woman who many people adore and love."**

Jessie laughed a bit then, biting her lower lip again as she looked over at the clock again then back at Noelle **"Harley's not that bad though; she's sweet and loves me apparently. I wouldn't mind getting to know her, she's really nice…" **Jessie nodded with a smile, feeling quite happy when talking about Harley **"But um, that's all I have to say for right now." **

Noelle nodded and scribbled a few things down onto the paper on her clip-board then smiled, looking back at Jessie then **"I think you've done quite well today, that is really good, Jessie. I'll see you next week?"**

"**Of course." **Jessie grinned as she got up from her chair, walking around the desk as Noelle got up from her chair, walking after Jessie and shutting the door close behind her. Today was rather interesting, and tomorrow would probably be too.

**0000**


End file.
